👋 This is random but..
It's Monday. I'm here for you.
Hi, Friend! It's me, Jen Glantz.
I went to visit a friend in Staten Island last week and during my 90-minute commute there, I sat in a puddle of iced coffee. Wouldn't be such a big deal but I was wearing these thin white linen pants and so it looked like I pooped in my pants.
As I got deeper and deeper into the island, and further away from my closet, I thought: wtf am I supposed to do? I couldn't pull the middle school trick I used to do when I had my period of tying a sweatshirt around my waist and the only store open near me was a CVS and for some reason I just knew they didn't sell pants. Socks, yes. Slippers, sometimes. But pants, never.
I was walking to meet my friend and a woman pulled over, rolled down her window, and like a giraffe, stuck her neck out to tell me that I had coffee alllll over my butt.
I know, I said, certain of my not-so-rookie mistake. These are the 3rd white pants I've ruined this season. You'd think I would have learned my lesson. I don't know what to do. I'm meeting a friend and I….
I feel you. She said, embarrassed for me. I thought she was going to yell get in and race me to the nearest Target. I'm so delusional and trusting of strangers that I probably would have been her passenger. I was so desperate that I hallucinated that all of this happened and walked toward her car.
I hate when that happens! she said, pressing on the gas and speeding away, leaving me, my brown-stained pants to fend for themselves in the middle of Staten Island.
I spent the rest of the day saying: I know, I know, it looks like I pooped my pants but I just sat in some coffee! to literally anyone who made eye contact with me. Even people who didn't, who just heard my voice in the distance, I'd warn them by saying: make way! coffee stains on my butt are about to enter the chat!
It really wasn't that bad. Most people didn't notice or they didn't say anything. By the middle of the day, I forgot about it.
The real real is we think people are examining us so closely that they see our every flaw. I'm convinced everyone who has ever come into contact with me has memorized the constellation patterns of my acne scars.
Okay, honestly………….I felt too self-conscious to go to an event this week because I'm not looooving how I look and my arms feel flabby and I was certain that every single person at this event would grab their phone and text a loved one saying: Have you seen the way Jen Glantz's arms don't have as much muscle definition as they used to?
It's important to note that I literally knew only one person at this event. It's also important to note that I was planning on wearing baggy sleeves to hide this. It's also important to note that I know how freaking ridiculous this sounds now but at the time I was like I can't leave my apartment because of my ARMS!!!!!!!!!
I seemed to forget that the insecurities we adopt and shelter don't mean as much to anyone else. People are booked and busy trying to mask their own stuff and the time and energy and self-confidence that takes is just all too much that they don't have it in them to care much about ours.
This is a good thing. This is one of those things in life that the sooner we realize them the sooner we don't feel so awkward around others or be so cruel to our own selves.
Everyone I told about the coffee butt stain was like oh, okay, anywayyyyyyy and really didn't care. Nobody was like WOW that's so embarrassing, except for the woman who pulled over to tell me, which looking back, it would have been a really bad idea to get in her car.
I started to feel better and then I came home and ran to hug my Gemma girl who after latching onto me and looking down, backed away and said:
Mommy, did you poop your pants?
Nobody notices your flaws except for toddlers. They see them. They will tell you that they see them. And you never thought in a million years that someone being so blunt and honest about the things you work 9-5 to hide would make you laugh so hard.
It looks like I did, doesn't it? But before I could even finish telling her the whole saga, she pulled over a basket of magnetic blocks and asked me to build a castle. For Burt, she said. Ernie, too.
Take care of yourself this week (ilysm),
🎵Press Play
A fun song to start your Monday off with. I’ve loved this one for years!
📖 Everyone is Lying to You
I’m waiting for this book to arrive in the mail but I’m so excited to read it. Jo is an amazing fiction writer and I’ve loved all her other books.
🩱Sweetheart One Piece
I absolutely swore I’d never wear a one-piece bathing suit but I’m in the pool almost every day with Gemma and we’re floating around and my bikinis are just not serving the look I want them to. Gemma can’t swim yet, so I’m holding her in the pool and I don’t have extra hands to worry about my body parts popping out of my tiny swimsuit. I tried a dozen one-piece options and this one is the most flattering, while still looking cute on. I got it in classic black.
👕 Mesh T-Shirt
On the hot hot days, I wear this mesh top (with a sports bra under) and it lets the breeze hit and doesn’t trap heat. I have it in bone and black. Love, love, love. I wear the top with these pants for a cool Brooklyn mom look. Ps. Necklace dupe of the one I’m wearing here.
🧽 Magic Eraser
I’m probably years behind on knowing this is a thing — but I’m mesmerized by the magic eraser. When we moved in our apartment, someone had lived there before for 10-years and the building didn’t paint or touch up the walls. It’s been bothering me how there are marks alllll over the walls and it looks like someone drew all over them with an eyeliner pencil. I used one of these and in seconds, it all went away. It was honestly amazing and worth every single penny.
Thank you for reading this week’s pick-me-up. I adore you! I’ll be back in your inbox on Monday. Until then, hit reply and say helllloooo!
If you want to follow me on @jenglantz, I’d love it. And if you have anything to share or ask, hit reply or comment below.
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Hi Jen, I loved this week's message. And I totally feel ya about worrying what others think. Two and half years ago I decided to stop dying my hair and let my grey grow out. I was honestly terrified at first (everyone is going to think I look so old!) but the more it grew out and blended with my blonde hair the prettier it got. Now, I get compliments all the time on my light grey/blonde/ silver hair. And it's never been healthier! So, cheers to us who love ourselves and believe we are enough just the way we are.