👋 You call this taking care of yourself?

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Hi, Friend. Jen Glantz here.

Last week I mentioned that I’m dealing with a health thing. This week, I wanted to share what’s been going on.

Three weeks ago, I woke up on a sunny Saturday morning and felt uncomfortably dizzy. The world was spinning and I could not get it to stop. My body carried itself like a person who had rushed to finish a bottle of sauvignon blanc on an empty stomach. My insides panicked. It felt like all of my organs were beating so fast, like they were trying to tell me: dooooo somethinggg about thisss or we will shut down.

I clutched onto Adam for dear life. Help, I begged.

I wanted to go to the hospital but I didn't know how I would get there. I couldn't walk more than a few steps and I didn't think I'd make it a block in an ambulance. Plus, Gemma. My little Gemma was just trying to play with her mommy.

I had no idea what was going on. Worse, I had no idea how to make it stop.

That level of intensity lasted a day. But the next two weeks were weird. I was completely off-balance, woozy, nauseous, and dizzy. Some days, I couldn't walk from my bed to the bathroom. Other days, I could only stomach a banana. Most days, I couldn't read, look at my phone, or go on the computer. I spent a lot of time sitting in my bed using my mind as entertainment.

But my mind wasn't in the mood.

Let's think about our favorite high school memories, I'd ask it.

Instead, it would pretend to be WebMD. These symptoms are really strange. You're not getting better. What if you never get better? Maybe something is seriously wrong. What if this is it for you? I don't want this to be it for you.

These thoughts made my untamed anxiety feel like it was chugging Red Bull. I'd try everything I could to get my mind to switch to Ginger Ale and settle down, but it just wasn’t willing to play along.

While I was feeling crummy, I found a major distraction: my new hobby of obsessively worrying about and preparing for a brainMRI.

I had never had one before, so I asked Google and Reddit to tell me about it. And wow, did I learn tooooo much.

Are you claustrophobic? Why yes I am!

Do you have anxiety? It's practically my middle name!

Then getting an MRI will be impossible for you. OK great!

The more I read about this MRI thing, the more I spiraled into panic mode and spent every waking moment trying to figure out how I’d make it through this test.

Why was I so scared?

Ever since I was a little kid, my biggest fear has been going down enclosed slides (the MRI machine feels like an enclosed slide even though it’s open on both ends). See an example here:

When I was 6, got stuck in an enclosed slide and couldn't figure out how to get out. I'm haunted by that memory even 30+ years later.

When I see enclosed slides at the playground, I turn Gemma's attention away from them. She's at an age where if she goes down a slide, I have to go down with her, and I am not going down one of those! Waterslides are a different kind of nightmare that I don't even mess with.

I found out there's an option to do an open MRI or stand-up MRI where you don't have to be inside of a tiny little tube. I called 12 of those places and none of them had appointments until April!

I needed to get this brain and inner ear MRI to rule out serious stuff — like cancer, tumors, tissue damage, hemorrhages and more. I couldn't wait until April to do that.

So I took the first appointment I could get at a traditional tiny tube MRI place. I had one week to prepare and face my strange fear.

I found this incredible website on Reddit called HappyMRI that helps prepare people like me who are scared of getting an MRI. One tip it had was to practice for the test as much as you can by lying under your bed with an eye mask on and blasting MRI sounds (MRI sounds are loud and jarring) for 25-30 minutes (the length of the test).

I did that twice a day for a week. The preparation helped me feel prepared for the MRI test.

I found several things that helped me get through it: Adam standing in the room with me (his silent presence was calming), wearing an eye mask before lying down so I couldn't see the head cage or the inside of the machine, and being able to wear headphones to listen to my choice of music. I chose a concert recording that always makes me happy.

That’s me right before the MRI test.

My MRI results came back the next day and everything was negative. MAJOR PHEW!

It's been three weeks of dealing with this health thing. I feel so much better today than I have in a long time.

BUT I'm still not sure what is/was wrong with me.

I went to four different doctors. Three of them said it was one thing. The fourth doctor said they were all completely wrong and thought it was another thing. My calendar is still lined with more doctor appointments and tests.

The first three doctors said it was a virus that attacked my inner ear and caused nerve damage.

How does one get this type of virus? Google made it clear: it usually manifests inside people who do not take care of themselves (lacking sleep, vitamin D & B, eating poorly, stress, etc.).

Worse, the recovery for this type of virus can take months or years.

I sadly laughed when I read that people who are prone to "anxiety/depression, and have a fear of bodily sensations" have a poorer recovery.

Adam, am I hallucinating? I asked when I read that. Am I being Punk'd?

I am all of those things. How will I ever get better?

I called my mom quite often during the day to help me stay calm.

Maybe this is a wake-up call, she'd hint. That you need to take care of yourself more. Your whole life, you've always taken care of everyone else. You never do the same for yourself.

She's absolutely right. I'm an empathetic people-pleaser whose type-A personality is directed at the wrong things — like trying to control every situation to protect the people I love and the work that I do — but it's never used to make me better.

I eat what's in sight to stay full. At my annual physical last year, my bloodwork showed that I'm super deficient in a bunch of things and my doctor urged me to take a handful of vitamins. I bought the vitamins! I have not taken them. I don't sleep very well at night (toddler sleep regressions are a wild, wild thing), and my stress levels are always raising the roof around here (I am/have never been “chill”).

Can I fix a lot of this? Can I take better care of myself?

What would life feel like if I took better care of myself — not just health wise?

I think it would feel like I’m actually living my life and not dragging my feet through the days, watching them fall and melt like February snow.

I think it would mean that I’d feel better, happier, understand my sense of self again.

I think it would mean everything to me if I was able to figure out how to take care of myself again. To take care of myself like I take care of everyone that I love.

I’m working on figuring out how to do this — and I’ll share what I try and learn here — I’ll also update you on my health too.

But I put together this quiz below to help assess how well you are taking care of yourself — scroll down to see that! If you’re open to it, comment below with your number. I’ll share my number too. If you do, I’ll send you a little something to make you smile this week :)

Take care of yourself (will you??). ILYSM.

-Jen Glantz

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👏 Instant Pick Me Ups

🛒: Things I loved so far this month:

• Here is the link to my book!! Finally the Bride. Thank you for considering reading the book and for your support. There are so many ways to help an author — so here are some if you have a few mins to spare:

  -Leave an Amazon review for the book! I want to try to get to 100. Can you help me? You can leave a review this in under 15-seconds here.

  -Share the book with anyone in your world who might be in the mood for a rom-com with a lot of twists, laughs, and oddball moments.

  -If you’re on Goodreads, a rating/review also helps a lot too!

• Dance is therapy. This is the song that’s been keeping me moving forward and always helps me shake off anxiety.

• A cute rom-com if you want a cozy night on the couch.

• LOVE this workout/every day outfit in this natural rose color. The pants / the top

⏰: Let us not be scared of the work because it’s hard. Let us move the mountain because the mountain must move. -Danez Smith

Take Care of Yourself Quiz

Rate each statement based on your experiences over the past two weeks. Be brutally honest with yourself - this quiz is for your growth and wellbeing.

Scale:

1 = Never

2 = Rarely (1-2 times in two weeks)

3 = Sometimes (3-4 times in two weeks)

4 = Often (5-6 times in two weeks)

5 = Consistently (daily or almost daily)

Physical Vitality

1. I sleep 7-9 hours AND wake up feeling refreshed

2. I eat protein with every meal

3. I consume at least 5 servings of vegetables and fruits daily

4. I drink water before I feel thirsty (minimum 8 glasses daily)

5. I exercise until I break a sweat

6. I stand up and move at least once every hour while working

7. I take my medications/vitamins exactly as prescribed

8. I floss my teeth

9. I spend at least 10 minutes in direct sunlight

10. I avoid looking at screens for at least 1 hour before bedtime

Emotional Intelligence & Mental Clarity

11. I acknowledge difficult emotions without trying to change them

12. I write down my thoughts and feelings

13. I say "no" to requests that would overwhelm me

14. I take breaks BEFORE reaching mental exhaustion

15. I celebrate small wins and progress

16. I actively challenge negative self-talk

17. I set aside dedicated worry time instead of letting anxiety spiral

18. I practice mindfulness or meditation

19. I engage in an activity that makes me lose track of time

20. I consciously identify things I'm grateful for

Meaningful Connections

21. I have a meaningful conversation (beyond small talk) with someone I trust

22. I express appreciation to someone in my life

23. I ask for help when I need it

24. I maintain boundaries with people who drain my energy

25. I participate in my community or a group activity

26. I spend quality time with pets or nature

27. I share my authentic feelings with someone

28. I listen to others without trying to fix their problems

29. I reach out to someone I haven't talked to in a while

30. I engage in physical touch (hugs, massage, cuddling) that feels nurturing

Purpose & Growth

31. I learn something new just because it interests me

32. I make progress on a long-term goal

33. I engage in creative expression

34. I do something that aligns with my core values

35. I reflect on my personal growth

36. I read or listen to content that expands my perspective

37. I contribute to something bigger than myself

38. I challenge myself to try something slightly uncomfortable

39. I organize or clean my physical space

40. I create or maintain systems that make my life easier

Scoring & Analysis:

Calculate your score for each section:

Physical Vitality (questions 1-10): ___ out of 50

Emotional Intelligence (questions 11-20): ___ out of 50

Meaningful Connections (questions 21-30): ___ out of 50

Purpose & Growth (questions 31-40): ___ out of 50

Total Score: ___ out of 200

Section Scoring Guide:

41-50: Exceptional care in this area

31-40: Strong foundation with room for optimization

21-30: Developing habits need strengthening

11-20: Area needs significant attention

0-10: Critical area requiring immediate focus

Overall Score Interpretation:

161-200: Thriving - Your self-care practice is robust and intentional

121-160: Sustainable - You have good habits but could deepen your practice

81-120: Surviving - Basic needs met but requiring more intentional care

41-80: Struggling - Important to address multiple areas of wellbeing

0-40: Crisis - Seek support and prioritize fundamental self-care

Deep Reflection Questions:

1. Physical Patterns:

• When during the day do you feel most energized?

• What specific foods or activities reliably boost your energy?

• What's your biggest barrier to consistent physical self-care?

2. Emotional Awareness:

• What emotions do you tend to push away?

• Where in your body do you feel stress first?

• What triggers your strongest emotional reactions?

3. Relationship Dynamics:

• Who are your "energy givers" vs. "energy takers"?

• What boundaries do you need to strengthen?

• How do you show up differently with different people?

4. Purpose & Values:

• What activities make you lose track of time?

• When do you feel most alive and authentic?

• What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?

Action Planning:

1. Choose ONE item from each section where you scored lowest. For each:

   • What's the smallest possible step you could take tomorrow?

   • What would make this easier to accomplish?

   • What support or resources do you need?

2. Identify your "keystone" habits:

   • Which habits, when strong, tend to make other good habits easier?

   • Which habits, when they slip, tend to make other habits fall apart?

3. Design your environment:

   • What could you add or remove from your space to support better habits?

   • How could you make healthy choices more convenient?

   • What triggers can you set up to remind you of your priorities?

Weekly Check-in Questions:

1. What depleted your energy this week?

2. What replenished your energy?

3. What boundaries held strong?

4. What boundaries need reinforcing?

5. What new insight did you gain about yourself?

6. What's one small way you can increase your self-care next week?

Remember: Self-care isn't about perfection—it's about awareness and intentional choices. Start where you are, use what you have, and do what you can. Progress happens through small, consistent actions, not dramatic overhauls.

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