👋 You look good on paper
It's Monday. I'm Here for You.
The Pick Me Up is a Monday morning newsletter filled with advice, personal stories, and tips to help you get out of bed and jumpstart your week.
Greetings friend.
It’s me — Jen Glantz.
I’m writing to you from Worcester, Massachusetts. I spoke at Clark University today. It’s the second time I’ve traveled for work since I became a mom. Let me tell you, it was nearly impossible to get myself out the door on and onto the airplane. The sadness. The guilt. The pressure of just wanting to stay with my girl and twirl around our routine.
When I left, I remembered that in life, there’s always something we’re running toward, but to get there, we have to leave something behind.
Some days, I march full speed ahead with the goal of being the greatest mom in the entire world. I miss deadlines, forget about drafts in my inbox, and push off my to-do’s.
Other days, I sit at a desk in a co-working space in a blazer and try to make big things happen for myself as an entrepreneur.
We can’t be everything, always.
Most of the time, we are waddling around as one main thing, while everything else hangs on us like a clunky accessory.
The entire time I was gone, I felt bad leaving.
But when I got back, I felt really proud to sit down with Gemma and tell her that a University in Massachusetts hired me to guest lecture two classes, sit on a panel, and lead a round table.
It took me a decade to get here, I told her. And I’m excited that now I get to share these moments with you.
In this issue: A debate about how much we should care about how we look on paper verses how we live our lives.
Why you’re getting this: I'm Jen Glantz and this is The Pick-Me-Up newsletter. I've been sending it every Monday, for 8-years, to thousands of awesome humans, just like you. Thank you for letting this email live in your inbox. It truly makes my heart explode with joy.
Ps. I’m so grateful that you’re reading this because writing this newsletter every week is my favorite thing. If you know anyone who would adore getting this in their inbox, it would mean the world if you’d share it.
⚡Instant Pick Me Ups
Ps. All of the picks from the past few months are all inside this list here!
📚: I hardly ever read celebrity memoirs but I’m really interested in Britney’s book & Julia’s book.
📄: I wrote an article about how my best friend broke up with me 4+ years ago and how it was the blessing in disguise I needed to change how I approached friendship.
🎙️: A new podcast I’m starting to listen to because I love hearing about scams.
🌎:I have a lot of friends and family deeply impacted by what’s happening in Israel right now. As they send me resources and information, I update this post from last week so that all of the resources are in one place.
👗: I spend a lot of time hunting for clothes that look good on my postpartum body. The outfit I wore to speak last week included: these pants (super flattering), a blouse similar to this, simple shoes, and this extra-large bag. Also, my favorite leggings of 2023 are these - a little pricey but I have one pair and I wear them 4x a week. Very flattering and comfortable.
🛠️: I built a tool! It can write you a personalized maid of honor speech instantly. We also launched a best man version too — check it out!
You Look Good on Paper
At Clark University, I spent the day guest lecturing, sitting on a panel, and hosting a round-table for student entrepreneurs.
Most of the people I met had already started a business (from homemade jewelry, to pastries, a sports content creator, to a mixed media artist). I was in awe, especially because 90% of the people I met knew they wanted to be an entrepreneur from a very young age.
I told them my truth.
My story is much different.
I grew up knowing that I wanted to be one thing -- a writer. From a very early age, I took to words on paper as my truest form of expression. I used to check out 25 books from the library, read them, and then write down favorite lines inside my diary. I wrote a full-length book in the fourth grade about my babysitter Erin (sort of creepy now, but back then it was cute).
Writing books was all that I wanted to do.
But then I grew up a little more and went to college. I majored in poetry. I joined clubs. I became president of a 150-person sorority. For the first-time in my life, my heart was shared with new life goals. I loved writing, but running a sorority made me fall in love with speaking, mentoring women, and being in charge of a business (which is essentially what a sorority is). It made me realize that I wanted to do more things with my life than just write books.
That’s when I became confusing on paper.
For so much of our lives, we’re told to pick one thing and stick with it. People who flip-flopped majors in college were labeled “lost” and people who didn’t have 5-years of experience in one industry on their resume were rumored to be “all over the place”.
Before it becomes obvious, we’re all working hard to just look good on paper.
But why?
Your resume doesn’t tell your story. It tells a story that robots and AI tools find impressive enough to pass through for a human to see.
I read my resume out loud for the students. Look! None of this adds up. I spent a year post-college working as a consultant for the sorority, then as an assistant at a magazine, then in PR, then at a tech start-up, then Bridesmaid for Hire happened, and here I am.
If you knew me because of my resume, you wouldn’t dare to know me.
Some people I know, know what they wanted. They graduated school and became their career. Almost 15-years later, many of them are still doing that. And I love that for them, truly. I used to be jealous of that and wondered why I didn’t want that for me.
But if you’re someone who is feeling lost or uncertain or on and off so many paths, perhaps that is not such a bad thing?
One woman I met is graduating in a few months and she doesn’t want to do anything related to her major. She’s not sure what she wants to do but she’s going to take any job she can get and go from there.
I told her the most important truth I wish I knew decades ago:
Don’t be scared of your own journey. Don’t shy away from sharing it.
Tell people what you thought you wanted, what you did next, and how it led you here. You’d be surprised. Perhaps you have the skills for the job but you know what else you have? A lot of other skills and experience that other candidates might not that make you interesting.
I remember when I got that job in PR, I had no experience. I hardly knew what PR was to be honest, but the job was in NYC and if I convinced them to hire me, it would get me out of Florida. When my boss called me to offer the job he said: it’s obvious I’ve never done PR in my life but I’m a writer, worked for a magazine, and had experience at a local newspaper. He thought my perspective was valuable and because of that, he offered me the job.
I was good at PR but I didn’t like the job.
I spent a year and half calling reporters, begging them to cover stories about my clients, getting hung up on, and calling back until they said: okay, fine.
When I got a new job at a tech start-up, I thought: what a waste! I’ll never use those PR skills again.
But years and years later, when I started Bridesmaid for Hire, those silly little skills helped me get on the TODAY Show — and in tons of other media outlets too.
I didn’t like that PR boss for so many reasons, but I do admire how he took a chance on me for my potential and not just what I looked like on paper.
Squiggly lines are lines too.
You could be so many things in your life, how fun!
Life is not going to last forever, you know?
Don’t ever be scared to live many different versions of it while you’re here.
Look good on paper, but in my opinion, may your story be the length of a book.
Love,
👩 Real Life Pick-Me-Ups:
I was really scared to write last week’s post and want to thank you all for so much kindness. It flooded my inbox and washed away a few really awful messages that came my way.
Some of the happiest people I’ve ever met are people who have lost everything in life and are now so grateful for every little thing they have. You can see it in the thickness of their smile, feel it in the way they hug you hello, and notice it in the way they open their eyes to see what is around them. We often see happy people and think: wow, they don’t have a care in the world! But that’s not true. Their struggles and fears are invisible to us. Some people’s happiness is a result of surviving so many alternatives.
I’m back on my 2-bedroom apartment in Brooklyn manifestation game. I don’t exactly know how to manifest but I’m trying to do everything I can to get a bigger apartment (in the area/price range that I want). I’m about to print a t-shirt that says: can I take over your 2-bedroom apartment lease please? More info: it’s hard to land a 2-bedroom in the area I live in because prices have skyrocketed around here so a lot of people aren’t moving because their rent is locked in at a low price.
Until next week — say hello!